October 5, 2021

Red flags. So many red flags. I saw them but chose to ignore them. He studied me like a book and learned my likes, dislikes and traumas. He then used that information to create the person I believed was my soulmate. He was “saving me” from an already bad place and blinding me with his narcissism. 

He was controlling from the start. He kept me from my family, friends and work. He convinced me that he was the only one who truly cared. Two years into our relationship, he relapsed on meth and pills. At this time, I knew nothing about drugs, but it wasn’t long before I was addicted, too. The abuse got extremely bad after that. He had me right where he wanted me, completely vulnerable to him. 

The emotional, physical, and mental abuse would go on for years. My kids witnessed a ton of abuse. My oldest son saw things that no child should have to see. The cycle of leaving, doing well, letting him back in my head then returning to the same situation constantly repeated itself. Because of the abuse and drug use, the state Department of Human Services got involved and took our three kids. 

DHS insisted I attend rehab. I chose a free 90-day, faith-based program — twice in one year. After I graduated the second time, I decided I was done with him. I chose my kids. I got a job, a house and did what was required to gain custody back. Two weeks before I was to get my kids, I went to pick him up from rehab. Once again, I was blinded by his narcissism. I thought he had changed. I wanted a family again. I let him back in. We were using again within days, and he was beating me worse than ever before.

I am a survivor! I have been given the opportunity to use my story to give back to what’s been given to me. I give all the glory to my God…

At my lowest, I was homeless, and my rights to my kids were terminated. I was getting beaten beyond recognition daily and had track marks all over my arms. I wanted to die. I prayed to God to save me. I could not do it by myself. Within hours of my prayer, my ex-husband beat me in public, and someone called the cops. He was arrested, and I was sent to the Gulf Coast Center for Nonviolence. That event changed my life. 

I had a change of heart after three days. I woke up and accepted my reality. I finally had resources available to me. I took every class the Center had. I took life skills and parenting classes and participated in individual and group therapy sessions. I soaked it all in. I chose to change my mindset. I got rid of all my limiting beliefs and started acting as if I were already the person I wanted to be. The Center believed in me, and so I believed in myself. They saved me. 

After three months of living there, I moved into an apartment, started getting my kids every other weekend and took classes to become a certified peer support specialist. I am now two years clean and sober. I work at a drug and alcohol treatment center, where I help people just like me overcome addictions and past traumas. I live in Ocean Springs with my three children, and we are flourishing. I am a survivor! I have been given the opportunity to use my story to give back to what’s been given to me. I give all the glory to my God, and I am beyond thankful for the Center. 

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence issues, reach out to the Center. When you’re ready, your life can change. Take advantage of their therapy, take all the classes, open up, set goals and fight to keep going. Life gets better — and YOU deserve better 

My name is Sharita Cook, and I am the mother of seven beautiful children, which includes five sons and two daughters. I am the eldest daughter of Larry and Janis Burks. My parents were hard workers. There were five of us altogether, two brothers and two sisters. My mother was a chef, and also a longshoreman, and my father worked at Ingalls shipyard and Anchor glass company. 

In my eyes, we lived a pretty normal life. But as time went on, I noticed my dad hitting my mom. Parents have fights, that can be normal, but things took a turn, and he shot my mother in the head in 1985. He shot her on Mother’s Day of all days, and I witnessed him go into his car and shoot himself. Neither parent died, but scars were left everywhere. 

When I got older and started to form relationships, I met the man who would father my children. The cycle continued, and I found him to be mentally and physically abusive. I still remember him beating the children, my boys. He was a mechanic, so he would use a fan belt that came off a car. He then had rough sex with me while I was pregnant until I lost my first daughter. 

I sought God and his word as much as I could. In his word, I found power and love — love for your fellow man and community.

With those memories, I sought God and his word as much as I could. In his word, I found power and love — love for your fellow man and community. 

As a child, I imagined helping people when I grew up. My first thought as I got older was feeding the homeless, so I started an out-of-pocket pursuit to help young women and children by mentoring them and allowing my home to be a shelter. 

That was too much to take on by myself, so I made a friend named Keli. I didn’t know our relationship would take us to where I am now. I had my hands in a lot of projects just trying to help. I really had a special connection with abused women, and I wanted a place for them to go and feel protected and empowered. I started a nonprofit organization called I am Knowledge. 

Keli wanted me to meet her mom to help me build my foundation. For years, we meant to meet to discuss some things, but with my busy schedule and thinking you have forever, I didn’t meet Keli’s mother then. It was only after a tragic event — the death of Keli and her baby in a domestic violence incident — that I finally got to meet Keli’s wonderful mother. 

Her mother and I have formed a relationship that has blossomed into something beautiful. After my talks with her, we decided I am Knowledge Foundation can be a rich resource to support women and children who experience domestic violence. We want to bring awareness and support to those women and families. Many women and children don’t know the signs or where to turn, and I want the foundation to be a beacon of hope, exemplifying love and encouragement to those abused families. 

Through faith in God, all things work together — as my story has shown.